Bird Is The Word

But... what is it? I have never seen anything this size in our yard... well, excluding the random deer. I would say this owl (?) stood at about 6 to 8 inches. Yes, it flew and had a fairly impressive wingspan.

It's The Gift That Just Keeps On Giving.....

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Just Messin' Around.

Don't Be A Tease, Square!

OK. Trying not to get insanely angry at Square/Enix of Japan. Trying to keep the faith.







Most likely you may know that I am an avid fan of RPG games. Specifically I like Square/Enix's line of Final Fantasy. Since I had to purge XI before it destroyed my life, I have been looking for a really good non-online/ non-MMORPG replacement for the ultra-dynamic adventures of XI. In December of 2004 I discovered that Square/Enix was readying the release if XII that would be OFF-line.








I have been looking forward to FF XII because it is carrying over the same "roaming sensory monster" battle engine that got me completely enthralled in FF XI. Meaning, instead of the "old-school" bullshit random battles that seem to pop out of thin air is gone and your own intelligence and stealth gauges whether you even start a battle. How? Cuz you can see the bastards roaming around you. Except FF XII is supposed to have built in some ambush models to keep you on your toes. Not that I have not gotten my ass beaten to the floor due to smart AI monsters in XI. Monsters in XI were able to sense you by sight, sound, smell, magic and health. Each different species would have a different way of seeking you out, XII is supposed to make this more complex.








I am also eager to try this newer battle system OFFLINE and not with some teenage twit in Japan that will leave me hangin out like fresh meat in front of starving agitated tiger just because my auto-translator skills are not up to par. I would rather solve the landscapes with my own brain on not trying to hold a group of 6 together for 8 hours only to never get anything done and get most likely dead because tommy's mommy said its dinner time.

No more MMORPG for me. Too much cheating, too much time, too many angry people.

And XII will hopefully fulfill my now niche RPG thirst.

And it will be released in March of 2005. No, November 2005. Scratch that. December 2005. Did I mention this game was released in Japan in 2003?








Hold on.

Release date is now slated for March 2006.








Nope.

The Movie Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children is being released for Christmas 2005.

The re-release of Final Fantasy VII (one of my favorite versions (RPG 1996)) the game but changed to a 3rd person action adventure? VII was the shit I must admit. Chocobo breeding and races. In game video arcades. It was a sign of things to come. This is will be available JUNE 2006... maybe.

What about FF XII for crying out loud!!!!!

Currently, August 1, 2006. Wonderful timing you bastards!








So its taking you almost 4 freakin years to translate all that Japanese? Perfecting the game for North America? Or are you up to no good? Force all your fans to buy a brand new Playstation 3 (Spring 2006) when you change what you want to do with your obviously valuable instant platinum game?

Square/Enix knows that crazed fans like myself will do almost anything to get the next installment in their epic stylized RPGs.

Then they went and released playable demos at E3 last year.... and all the movies circulating all over the internet. Including G4: Cinematech's little teaser video today.

All this teasing is driving me mad. I might be speaking Japanese before long.... I might accomplish becoming completely fluent before Square/Enix finally gets their shit together and releases that damn game.

Learning Phase

My Impending Doom

We Declared What?!

Ok, so this is like ...getting a little too ridiculous. Politicians are blaming one another for trying to destroy Christmas. I have been hearing this goofball stuff for the last couple weeks and I'm sick of it. So, I am going to set things straight. Or, explain how things have been for the last 200 years.

Church (and/or Religion) is separated from state. It says so in our United States Constitution.

Done.

This does not mean Christmas is under fire. It means that people who do not believe in Christianity will not be persecuted or singled out for their own beliefs and they don't have to have it shoved down their throats everyday.

This also means all government property should have nothing about religion what-so-ever. No crosses, no nativity scenes, no 10 Commandments, no prayer in the classroom (unless a student is exercising their speech rights), no bibles. Which also includes that I don't support swearing in our President on one either. A New Testament Bible... gee, can't wait for the first Jewish President.

This DOES NOT mean that you are stopped from practicing your religion. Pound a cross into your front yard, Praise Jesus in the public or in your church. Go ahead; celebrate in what you believe. I could care less what you do.

I personally like Christmas' traditions. Not really a believer in the whole Jesus thing, but the Christmas tree is fun to get, swapping gifts is cool... the whole ambience is pretty neat for me. But I'm not religious about it, I just enjoy the non-religious traditions. Frosty.... Rudolph... Santa... Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men... that stuff.

Politicians seem to think that people like myself are out to destroy Christmas because we don't want the religious side of it displayed ANYWHERE! Thats just not true. I have recently heard that malls and shopping centers have stopped using religious specific wording and decorations .... but its not pandering to my non-religiousness. Nope, those stores want everyone's money... they want even the Muslims, Jews and Buddhists to get in their store and buy it all up. The stores just want everyone in on the tradition by making it less Christian specific. Welcome to our capitalist society.... nobody ever said that us non-religious were stopping you from celebrating your beliefs! So go ahead, celebrate your traditional Christmas.... I'm going to celebrate my type of traditional Christmas. If you don't like it... tough! I don't like shallow Christian politicians... but I'm not gonna shove that in your face on national television.

You Christians have to ask yourselves more of, "What would Jesus do?" and less of "How would Jesus judge that guy?".

Roaming Demons

You may have noticed that I completed "Confronting My Demons" Parts 1 through 3 of 6. I have been wanting to continue this series because it is important for me to formally document this stage of my life. The several years I have been documenting have drastically changed who I was in an extreme short period of time. Parts of my old me will always be there, but a lot of other parts died at that time. I yearn to have the positive parts back that died long ago... the energy, creativity and thoughtfulness that was stifled and smashed.

In order to do this correctly, I have been dragging up a ton of old sad depressing angry feelings that I have put away a long time ago. I think a lot of people have put those feelings away too. Though I would love to continue this series because it finally puts some bloody madness to final rest, I can't help but stop myself from continuing do to the fact that Parts 4 and 5 include descriptions and stories of people I have since repaired relations with. I also know for a fact that some of these people may have been reading my blog... I have given them the link, no reason why they shouldn't.

You see, its been easy so far. I have severed some key relationships that I discussed in Parts 1 through 3. I also doubt they even know what a "blog" is .... or will ever try to have a relationship with myself ever again. In some cases its been over 14 years since the supposed "relationship" has been severed. Its been extremely easy to tell my story... my raw truth.

That's the point of the series.... talk about the raw truth. What was seen in my vision... my perspective (hence the eye pics). I feel that I would be doing myself and you a disservice by warping my own raw truth in order to protect my current situations. But I would like to complete this series.

Please tell me what you think.... this has been rolling around in my head for months.

A letter recently put this to the forefront of my mind again. The Captain of the boat that CV79 and I are getting married on have confirmed that two individuals may be joining us that have been described in Parts 1 through 3. The evil side... my id has been teasing me to send them the link to this page. Outrage and denial will be their first response... kinda like when I brought up their "no blacks" rule after their wedding which included a black photographer. At the same time... why waste the binary code and electricity on people I have ignored and shunned for 14 years?

"Confronting My Demons Parts 1,2 & 3"

The Happy, The Crying & The Talking Dead

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E-M@IL: Benners' World

Natural Privacy

My plant has taken over the back window!







My big wobbly cactus needs support these days. When I bought it a couple years ago it was only about 5 inches tall. Now it towers and lists dangerously forward. It thrived this last summer when we were out of town and shut off the A/C... it just added 4 inches within about 9 days.

Lights On A Windy Night

Take A Closer Look Chuck